Rock & Bach: I Needn't Tell You That That Crowd is A Crowd of Bastards

I Needn't Tell You That That Crowd is A Crowd of Bastards

Kangmin Shin — Wed, 30 Jan 2008 19:25:00 +0000

Something I miss about student life is being around professors. Not the young ones - who are ambitious and dull just like any other young people – but the tenured old timers who are long past their prime and are unwilling or incapable of keeping up appearances. I was at a comedy show last week where the comics were clearly inexperienced and having a hard time of it. Mostly I felt bad for them, but I also found myself thinking that their effort was unnecessary, since even the best stand-up is only so funny. Comedy is customarily used as a medium for virtuosic cerebration – it’s a way to show people how quick and agile your mind is under duress. It’s just one of many versions of the same dreary two-step of wanting to be liked and needing to do something about it.

It’s probably unrealistic to expect people to break out of this routine in youth, when even churlishness is calibrated with esteem in mind. But what seems costly in youth is inevitable in old age, and with mounting incapacity and approaching senescence, people become really, really, genuinely funny. Like the literature professor who, when someone mentioned the Adrian Lyne adaptation of Lolita, grew pensive before thoughtfully venturing, “Don’t you think Jeremy Irons makes a perfect pedophile?” Or the legal history professor who would non-sequitur his way through every lecture: “Caleb and Hepsebah are in the frontier. He tends cattle, she churns butter. What do they do for fun? I don’t know, sex, I guess. Doing the nasty. Why do we still use the Socratic method? I mean, what do you know? Like nothing, basically. You know, the Japanese have an extraordinarily violent history. I mean, think of all those grunting samurai.”

To me, this sort of don’t-give-a-fuck is what Op. 111 sounds like, with the joyous, frankly goofy third variation that suggests nothing so much as a person who’s finally managed to break free of social awareness, skipping about clumsily to the horror of better-regulated bystanders. Even in music instances of such unadulterated bliss are rare. I think of those long outros in My Bloody Valentine songs that give you the illusion of being trapped in one ecstatic moment forever – all of a sudden you really could care less about anything and all concerns seem ridiculous and petty.

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